The trip to Chicago started off well enough. We didn’t leave until after noon because Alex and Missy both had eye doctor appointments (Missy for the first time, since she had for the first time not done well enough on one at school, but the actual doctor found her vision to be just fine, so no glasses for her) and we needed to do some quick shopping at Wal-Mart. Anyway, we hit the road early afternoon, and since the air in the tires had been a bit low for a while I stopped just before getting on the toll road to top them off. Aaaaaaaand when I took the nozzle off the rear driver’s side tire, the valve stem blew out. Leading to rapid deflation. I was able to get the cap back on to slow it down long enough to move the van to a flat surface but it was flat flat within moments after that. Now I had never actually read the user’s manual for the van so I didn’t know how to even get the spare out, let alone whether there was any air in it. But I read my way through getting the tire down from its storage cubby and changing it out, and it had enough air to get back over to the air nozzles and press it back up to where I could drive on it. Then we asked my phone where the nearest Discount Tire was and headed there. Discount Tire was, for some reason, crazy busy and very shorthanded. So, it was a 3-hour wait to get the tire fixed and put back on. But while we were waiting, we did find a Great Clips next door and get haircuts for Alex and me, and there was a restaurant called Dickey’s BBQ Pit in the same strip mall, which turned out to be fantastic. We think of that as the reason why the tire blew there, so we could get some awesome BBQ. We got moving again around 6 or so and just headed to the motel, which was out near O’Hare. Friday we spent pretty much all day at the Field Museum. They have a big Jurassic World exhibition going on, which is basically just a bunch of animatronic dinosaurs with a Jurassic World-like theme to the exhibit (as you walk through, one of the “dinosaurs” get loose, yada yada). There is also a large exhibition of specimens, and the science of specimens, which was much more interesting than it sounds. Then the hall of animals, and gems and jewels, and we were about done by then. For dinner we met up with Auntie Irene and Jonathan and Karla at a brewery/pizzeria that they had found not too far from where they live, really good stuff there too, Jon and Karla thought it was probably going to become their place (they’re pretty new to Chicago). We did the obligatory trip to IKEA Saturday morning, bought a few things for the home but nothing major, and headed home.

Christmas seems to be pretty much over, although New Year's is still pending. I've been off work since Friday the 22nd. In the evening I finally set up the Christmas tree (I'd have skipped it altogether this year if I could have gotten away with it). Beth and I ran up to Nappanee on Saturday to pick up our half-cow. It is a large cow this year, although it seemed like we didn't get as many steaks (especially ribeyes, seemed short). Later on I took the kids to the Village to get some last minute shopping done, and we went to an evening showing of the new Star Wars movie. The Last Jedi was pretty good, although I did think it dragged a bit in the front half. Speaking of our cow, we still had a lot of meat left over (and we were having some difficulty getting all the meat put away in the freezer) so we packed a cooler for some friends to drop off after church Sunday. Also on Sunday, the snow started in earnest. By 9, it was coming down hard. By 12:30, the roads were getting bad. Laura and Thomas were coming in from PA and planning to get to Mom's by 3, but we were getting concerned that the roads would be bad enough that maybe we wouldn't want to stick around for dinner afterwards as we planned (I had to stop in Columbia City to get new wiper blades for the van). Beth and the kids and I got there around 3, Laura and Thomas were a bit late but made it with no problems. We hadn't seen Mom in a week, but she seemed to be doing all right. It didn't seem like it was registering that several days had passed since we saw her. But she also lit up when she saw that Laura was there. We got her a nice fuzzy blanket for Christmas, which she seemed to like a lot. We had a visit for a couple hours, during which she showed us her room several times and we watched TV in the common room, then brought her downstairs to sit in the larger room and watch the birds. Leaving was difficult; Mom wanted to go with me and didn't understand why she needed to stay there. She got agitated and didn't realize that she lives there. Anyway, we told her how far away we had to go and how cold it was outside and she eventually agreed to stay. Laura & Thomas and Beth & the kids and I all went out to dinner then at the Hoppy Gnome downtown in Fort Wayne, which was very good, they specialize in craft beer and tacos and seem to do those things quite well. Monday was Christmas: the kids were all up early but we made them wait until Laura and Thomas got here, which wasn't until around 9. Good haul for the kids again this year, pretty standard lines: Alex got video games, Missy got stuffed animals and art supplies, Natalie got clothes and makeup. For the rest of the day, we hung out at home because it was snowy and freezing. Laura and I went through what's left of Mom's stuff,and we had a nice dinner in. They stayed overnight again and left in the morning after breakfast.
Tuesday, Beth had a doctor appointment to discuss the antidepressant medication she's been on and hated for 10 years. She is going to go off it and back onto the medication she was on before, which means a month of weaning off it. Which is going to suck, but will be excellent in the end. Also Tuesday I replaced the ceiling fan in our bedroom, since the old one had been buzzing and making the lights in the house flicker whenever we ran it for a long time now. We bought a new one a couple weeks ago but I finally got to replacing it. It is so much quieter and no flickering lights!
Wednesday we went back to Fort Wayne again to visit Mom. When we first got there Mom was participating in a group activity (!!) so we left before she noticed us to go to Barnes & Noble and come back later. Time was short since Nat had counseling later that day so we split up, with the girls staying at the mall to get some shopping done and Alex and I going back to visit Mom. She didn't have any problems when we left this time, thankfully. We raced back to town for Nat's appointment after a short visit. Today, we're all headed to Chicago.

Once again, this week was mostly about Mom. After the tour last Friday we decided that Chapman Place would be a good place for her. That was hammered home during the week too, because she isn’t cleaning herself or changing her clothes unless someone from the home health care place makes her, and she’s been trying to exit the building or get someone who works there to take her home. Assisted living just isn’t enough any more. So, I went back to FW on Monday to start signing paperwork, which didn’t take all that long. Lake City Place and Chapman Place arranged things so Mom’s last day at Lake City was Thursday, and Friday was her moving day. So I went to visit a couple times during the week, and brought back several things so we didn’t have to move them all at the same time. Things I knew she wouldn’t need at the new place, like Gramma’s old violin and the dozens of photo albums and Grampa’s war mementos. I also got the rocking chair back this week from being re-caned, but she won’t have any place to put that either. Friday was the big day. I took the day off work, and Beth and I went to Lake City Place after breakfast to pack Mom up and get her moved. She was not very present. It didn’t seem to register with her that she was moving, but then she hasn’t known she lives there all along either. Beth took her to the kitchen in the common area to make some cookies while I packed so we could keep her out of the way, but mostly she just sat there and didn’t talk, and fell asleep a couple times. We had both the van and the truck, so I was able to get everything that we were moving into both of them (the bed was tricky) and leave a few things to move out later. Beth and I took Mom to the new place, and she sat watching TV in the common area while I got everything moved into her new room. The room looks nice all set up, and everything we brought has a place, so she should be all set. I stayed until it was getting close to her dinner time. It didn’t seem to faze her when I left, but I’m sure she didn’t really comprehend that she had a new room at a new place and was going to stay there from now on. The place is certainly noisier and more chaotic than where she’s coming from, so I hope adjustment isn’t too hard. Anyway, the rest of her things are now in my house, taking up a lot of room. But I did get a better TV out of it.

Saturday was relatively quiet, Beth took the girls shopping in the morning and they were at a skating birthday party in the afternoon, after which we all went shopping again, including to TJ Maxx, since Natalie had a gift card from her birthday. However, that place is so crowded and chaotic it gave her a panic attack so things were cut short. Sunday we all went back to FW to visit Mom in her new place. She seemed content, more or less, but she still didn’t seem to realize that that was where she lived now. The nurses also told us that she slept in the common area on the couch the last 2 nights, and they couldn’t get her to go to her room, so they just let her sleep on the couch. But we brought her stuffed dog with us, which we had left at the other place by accident, so maybe she will now. Anyway, it was nice to see her out of the room…although when we went to see the room it was like she was seeing it for the first time. We also brought her a few pieces of jewelry and some of her fetishes, so she’ll have some more familiar things there now. We were able to take her downstairs at the place, where they have an aviary. Mom liked watching the birds. Again we stayed until close to her dinner time, and again it didn’t seem to faze her when we left. It seemed to us that she was fitting in there. Hope so. We just headed home after the visit.

Mom got discharged from the hospital on Tuesday. Monday, there was a conference call between me, the doctor, the case manager, Laura, Beth, and Lake City Place about what to do with Mom going forward. The doctor told us that she is medically ok, with moderate to severe dementia, paranoid, not agitated, slept ok, stayed in her room most of the time, and that assisted living is not enough for her. She needs more supervision. She’s also on a new prescription for an anti-psychotic. Beth made a bunch of phone calls and got us a tour at the Miller’s in Plymouth Monday night, but Lake City also called and said they are making some arrangements and Mom can stay there. Which is good, because neither Beth nor I was impressed with Miller’s. Seemed a sad place. And cluttered. And it didn’t smell very good either, but I’m sure that’s common in memory care. Anyway, we were wishing by the time the tour was over that we could tell Mom that if she can’t get by where she lives, then she’s going to wind up somewhere like that. But that would be meaningless to her. But, we’re both very happy that Lake City told us that she can stay there. They are going to add some in-home nursing care for her, and with that in place, they think they can make it all work. I’m sure glad for that. If she has to move out, I’m not going to see her nearly as much. I left work early Tuesday to go pick her up at the hospital. On the way home, she asked where we were going several times and didn’t seem to realize where she had been. She seemed pretty vacant, but that may have just been the new medication she’s on; she’s not used to it yet, I’m sure. But, as we were pulling into the driveway she said “Oh, I don’t want to go here!”so I guess she remembered it at least in some aspect. Beth and I met with David (the director) after I got out of work Tuesday and they seemed all set to keep her around. Revolution and FCC Kids had a roller skating party Tuesday evening, Tuesday so Natalie could go (she's had counseling on Wednesday since school started). I skated, Beth did not. Missy had her friend Abby over with us. The kids are getting better at skating, finally.
The end of the week got busy again. Friday was the teddy bear toss at the Komets game in Fort Wayne. The Boschains weren't able to go with us this time, though. Beth and I and the kids went, taking a bunch of stuffed animals that they were willing to part with and that hadn't sold at the garage sales this fall. For a while, we thought we might have to take them home, as the Komets failed to score for the first 2 periods and were down 2-0 midway through the 3rd. But then they scored twice like lightning, and regulation ended at 2-2. A scoreless overtime, and they went to a shootout which the Komets won when the goalie shut Toledo out on 3 shots. First time I've seen a shootout win. We got home late of course, which was inconvenient since Beth's big show at Wawasee was the next morning. She made a couple pots of soup (Soala and chili) and we got up early to set up and get selling, and I couldn't get back home right away because it was so busy. I came to get Natalie and bring her there to help (and sell cookies) in the early afternoon, then remembered we were supposed to ring the bell for Salvation Army at 1:00 so I ran back (late) and did it myself. And I must admit it felt strange saying Merry Christmas when it was 50 degrees outside and sunny. Usually it's freezing when we do that. Then back to the show to tear everything down around 3, by which time Beth had sold around $900 worth of soup. Incredible. The chili and soala nearly sold out. Sunday was Natalie's birthday, and what she wanted was to play paintball. So we did. We found a Groupon to a place near Churubusco, where for a set price you get the gun and helmet rental, 200 pellets, and use of the course as long as you want. There weren't many other people there so after a while we bought some more pellets. It was a lot of fun. Nat brought 2 friends, one of who had played there before, but nobody else had ever. Which brings up an important point: if you as a newby are asked by some kid with a full set of armor and a pro level gun if he can play with you, you say no. He killed us all. And at one point he made Nat cry, and I thought we were going to have to go home. But she rallied. He had shot her multiple times in the same spot...and his gun hurt a lot more than ours did. Anyway, we played several rounds in both courses they have there and had a lot of fun.