I'm still feeling like I'm in a fog. Laura called me over a week and a half ago to tell me that Dad had died and I still can't get used to the idea. I guess that's not unusual. For a couple days after getting the news I felt like I had to go back to Arizona, but I'm not sure why. It was almost the first thing. I don't even remember what I did at work when she called, but I started rushing around like I had to go back there as soon as possible. But there was nothing for me to do there, I know. Anyway. I didn't go, which is a good thing, I suppose, but I was filled with the sense of need to do something. I don't know what. The Saturday afterwards, the family and I went up to Michigan to go to an apple orchard that we'd heard about. We picked a whole bunch of apples and bought some apple wine (which wasn't all that great) and some other farmy stuff. The orchard itself is very nice but I don't think it's any better than ones around here. It did have Michigan apples, though. Anyway Laura extended her stay in Arizona much longer than she was expecting to, but was able to get pretty much everything she needed to get done, done. Last Wednesday she moved Mom to Indiana. They'd been packing and getting things ready as much as possible for the estate sale and getting bank accounts taken care of and such, authorized cremation, etc etc, but on Wednesday morning when they were leaving the house, Mom asked her where they were going and got upset because nobody had told her that she was moving. She started crying in the Lyft they were in to get to the airport, and Laura started crying...They flew to Chicago via Minneapolis, made it through an hour layover and a plane change, and made it to Chicago around 8:00 pm. I was there to pick them up and took Laura to Monica's house, then took Mom home. Mom's going to stay with us for a few days until we can get her settled into Lake City Place, which is an assisted living facility just a block from our house. Beth and I put her in our bed and sleeping in the living room for the few days until after Dad's memorial. We needed to get her to see a doctor and get a chest x-ray before she could move in, things like that. Friday everybody headed up to Michigan; Laura and I reserved a side room at Burdick's in Kalamazoo for a memorial for Dad. Laura and Monica came over from Chicago and Thomas came from PA. We set up a memorial display, photos from over the years on posterboard and cycling on Mom's MacBook; miscellaneous things from their travels and such. All of Mom and Dad's friends from Kalamazoo were invited, as was all the family that could be there. Auntie Irene and Jonathan & Karla also came over from Chicago. It was great to get more acquainted with them. I have not seen my cousin Jono in years. We had a really nice time, there was a good turnout and good time. I gave a eulogy that made me cry from the beginning to the end. I wasn't sure I was going to make it through the whole thing, actually, but I was reading from a printout or else I wouldn't have. Farewell, Dad.


We stayed in town for breakfast, then made some plans to see Jono and Karla around Christmas, and headed back home. We had an appointment with an agent from the long-term care insurance company to evaluate Mom, which they were doing at our house. She did a quick evaluation, and Mom was obviously impaired, so I'm hoping the evaluation comes out the way it should. We all took Mom over to the new place to look around and see her new room (Laura thought it looked much better than the place in PA she looked at) and have dinner there. We left her there and came back again later when she was getting ready for bed. She seemed to be doing all right there. We're hoping it gets even better when her things arrive. We came to visit again today and took her to our house for a little while; she didn't want to go back to her place but she did without too much fuss. We need to find something that she can do there to keep her busy. She can't do her iPad or computer games or craft stuff any more, she needs a TV but then she may just sit in there alone all the time when it comes. She likes having her jewelry to sort through. We think she might like a bird feeder by the window. Anyway, it looks like she'll be ok there, but to be honest she seems more functional than most of the old ladies that live there. I hope she'll fit in and be sociable, but I don't know that she will. I'm feeling guilty about putting her there...and I feel like we should just make room for her at my house. Even though I know that will not work and we can not take care of her. I just will have to be ok with the fact that she's there and I can go see her any time. Hope this all works out.